Improve yourself by going outside your comfort zone

Your comfort zone is exactly what it sounds like, places or situations where you feel comfortable in, while there is nothing wrong with comfort zones in order to expand our potential and succeed in life we sometimes have to move out of our comfort zone and into unfamiliar territory. Only by pushing ourselves to do something new or which we are afraid of can we develop and improve ourselves. The first step to take in venturing outside of your comfort zone is to decide what it is you wish to change about yourself or your life, the way you wish to go forward. Make a list of everything that you want to do or change what you’d like to accomplish, the places you would like to visit and what it is you want out of life. When you have determined your goals and objectives you can then take the next step in making them reality. Here are just some of the ways in which you can step outside your comfort zone.

Your self-image

How long is it since you last changed your appearance, for example how long have you had the same hairstyle? You can begin stepping outside your comfort zone by making changes to your self-image, try a different hairstyle, maybe a different color, and change the color of your make-up, shave off your beard or grow one, choose a different style of clothing than you would normally wear or alter the color. There are many ways which you could make small alterations to your self-image to give yourself a new look and a new look at life, stop and think if you are doing everything you possibly can to look and feel your best and give yourself a confidence boost by making positive changes to your self-image.

Do something different

Make it a weekly goal to do something completely different to what you would normally do; this can be anything just to get you out of the rut you have put yourself in and to widen your comfort zone at least one day a week. Start off with making smaller changes at first, go to a different restaurant for lunch, and order something from the menu which you have never tried; there are many ways you can make gradual small changes to your daily life.

Take up a new hobby

Take up a new hobby in life, join a weekly meeting group such as dieting, a book club or wine tasting, choose something which is out of character and which will get you meeting new people and going to new places. Doing something different every week and gaining a new interest is an excellent way of moving out of your comfort zone.

Meet your fears head on

Change is always frightening when we first step out into the unknown, but we can only improve upon ourselves and our lives by meeting and greeting our fears head on and passing through the fear, once we have met it head on we find it isn’t so frightening after all. So do something that scares you every week.

Making The Right Decision

Some of us find it easy to make decisions while others tend to procrastinate a lot when it comes to making decisions - particularly if they are important ones that could alter the pathway of our life. When making decisions in life changing situations it can be hard for everyone, after all the choice you make will affect your life and the route you choose to go might not be easily reversible or impossible to change. If we stop and look back on some of the biggest moments in our life that went wrong, we find that our biggest regrets come from faulty decision-making. Perhaps we went with our gut instinct when making a decision or we let ourselves be swayed by others, there are many reasons why we make the wrong decisions in life and almost everyone will have made the wrong decision at some time in their life. Here are some tips to help you with decision-making.

• Remember when making a decision, no decision is right or wrong, decisions are merely making a choice among alternatives.
• Always avoid making a snap decisions about something, if a decision is easily reversible then you can move fast on it while irreversible ones should be thought out.
• Jot down notes when making a decision, write down all solutions and include all relevant information, by seeing it written down in black and white sometimes the answer is staring you in the face.
• Write down all the pros and cons of the decision you make, it can help clarify your decision or help you to see any problems the decision might have.
• Make one decision at a time, never allow decisions to build up and force yourself to make them all at once.
• If others will be affected by your decision then get their input on the situation.
• Make a decision and stick with it, you have to recognize that you cannot know with 100% certainty that it is the right one but once made stick with it.
• Before following a decision through ask yourself what if anything could go wrong if you followed through with this choice.
• Once you have committed yourself to your decision then go with it whole-heartedly, let go of all the “what ifs” and do not bother yourself anymore.
• Visualize your decision in your head and follow it through in your mind, visualize all outcomes of the decision before actually following it through.
• Put faith in your ability to make a successful decision and your ability to follow it through.
• Review all the facts thoroughly before you make a decision, once you have reviewed them allow yourself to time to think about them before drawing a conclusion and determining your decision from the facts.
• Always try to base your decisions on what is right or feels the right thing to do.
• Remember to look at the objective of the decision, the alternatives to the decision and the risks of any alternatives to the decision.

Your Time Is Money

Besides taking steps too increase your value, you must also increase the time you spend creating value to boost your income. If you are self-employed, then you are usually paid by the hour or by the job. So obviously, when you work longer hours and more days, your income will increase!

Now you may be saying to me, ‘I am already working 18 hour days! How much harder can I possibly work?’ Or if you are working for somebody else you may be thinking, ‘ this does not apply to me. As an employee, my hours of employment are fixed from 9am to 6pm. I do not get paid more for working longer hours.’

Well, when I talk about increasing the time you spend creating value, I do not necessarily mean that you must work longer hours. Rather, you must spend more of your time only on activities that create the greatest value…that generate the most profits for your company.

Whether you are an entrepreneur or an employee, you will have a list of things that you must do daily as part of your role. You will find that not all the things you do create the same amount of the value. There are some activities that create high value while some activities are low in value. I

n fact, I have discovered that for most average income earners, they only spend 20% of their workday doing truly high value creation activities while they spend 80% of their time on low value activities like checking email, attending unproductive meetings, chit chatting, complaining, waiting, finding lost items…stuff that does not generate profits or help clients meet their goals.

High-income earners are the opposite. They tend to spend 80% of their time on high value creation activities like business development, closing sales, innovating new revenue streams, marketing strategy, following up with prospects, strategizing on how to improve productivity, managing projects, getting feedback from clients…stuff that lead to high customer satisfaction and higher profits!

So start keeping track of how you send your time each day and focus more of your time on high value creation activities and your income will increase. Spend your time on high value activities and you will maximize you income, making you a millionaire in no time.

Impossible is Just a Word

Everyone, at some point of his or her life, has dreamed of being somebody special, somebody big. Who hasn't fantasized about being the one who hits the game-winning homer? Who hasn't dreamed of being the homecoming queen? And how many times have we dreamed of being rich, or successful, or happy with our relationships?

Often, we dream big dreams and have great aspirations. Unfortunately, our dreams remain just that – dreams. And our aspirations easily collect dust in our attic.

This is a sad turn of events in our life. Instead of experiencing exciting adventures in self actualization, we get caught up in the humdrum of living from day-to-day just barely existing.

But you know what? Life could be so much better, if only we learned to aim higher.

The most common problem to setting goals is the word impossible. Most people get hung up thinking I can't do this. It's too hard. It's too impossible. No one can do this.

However, if everyone thought that, there would be no inventions, no innovations, and no breakthroughs in human accomplishment.

Remember that scientists were baffled when they took a look at the humble bumblebee. Theoretically, they said, it was impossible for the bumblebee to fly. Unfortunately for the bumble, bee no one has told it so. So fly it does.

On the other hand, some people suffer from dreaming totally outrageous dreams and not acting on them. The result? Broken dreams, and tattered aspirations.

If you limit yourself with self-doubt, and self-limiting assumptions, you will never be able to break past what you deem impossible. If you reach too far out into the sky without working towards your goal, you will find yourself clinging on to the impossible dream.

Try this exercise. Take a piece of paper and write down some goals in your life. Under one header, list down things ‘you know you can do’. Under another header, write the things ‘you might be able to do.’ And under one more, list the things that that are ‘impossible for you to do.’

Now look at all the headers strive every day to accomplish the goals that are under things ‘you know you can do’. Check them when you are able to accomplish them. As you slowly are able to check all of your goals under that heading, try accomplishing the goals under the other header-the one that reads ‘you might be able to do.’

As of the items you wrote under things I could do are accomplished, you can move the goals that are under things that are ‘impossible for you to do’ to the list of things ‘you might be able to do.’

As you iterate through this process, you will find out that the goals you thought were impossible become easier to accomplish. And the impossible begin to seem possible after all.

You see, the technique here is not to limit your imagination. It is to aim high, and start working towards that goal little by little. However, it also is unwise to set a goal that is truly unrealistic.

Those who just dream towards a goal without working hard end up disappointed and disillusioned.

On the other hand, if you told someone a hundred years ago that it was possible for man to be on the moon, they would laugh at you. If you had told them that you could send mail from here to the other side of the world in a few seconds, they would say you were out of your mind. But, through sheer desire and perseverance, these impossible dreams are now realities.

Thomas Edison once said that genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration. Nothing could be truer. For one to accomplish his or her dreams, there has to be had work and discipline. But take note that that 1% has to be a think-big dream, and not some easily accomplished one.

Ask any gym rat and he or she will tell you that there can be no gains unless you are put out of your comfort zone. Remember the saying, “No pain, no gain”? That is as true as it can be.

So dream on, friend! Don’t get caught up with your perceived limitations. Think big and work hard to attain those dreams. As you step up the ladder of progress, you will just about find out that the impossible has just become a little bit more possible.

"A Better You" Your 7 days program to self-improvement

I seem to lost count on how many times I've read and heard of celebrity marriages failing almost left and right. Not that I care (and personally I don't), it seems strange that we often see movie and TV stars as flawless people, living the fairytale life of riches and glamour. I suppose we all have to stop sticking our heads in the clouds and face reality.

There are many ways to lose your sense of self-esteem despite of how trivial it could get. But whatever happens, we should all try not to lose our own sense of self.

So what does it take to be a cut above the rest? Here are some of the things you can think and improve on that should be enough for a week.

1. Know your purpose
Are you wandering through life with little direction - hoping that you'll find happiness, health and prosperity? Identify your life purpose or mission statement and you will have your own unique compass that will lead you to your truth north every time.

This may seem tricky at first when you see yourself to be in a tight or even dead end. But there's always that little loophole to turn things around and you can make a big difference to yourself.

2. Know your values
What do you value most? Make a list of your top 5 values. Some examples are security, freedom, family, spiritual development, learning. As you set your goals for 2005 - check your goals against your values. If the goal doesn't align with any of your top five values - you may want to reconsider it or revise it.

The number shouldn't discourage you, instead it should motivate you to do more than you can ever dreamed of.

3. Know your needs
Unmet needs can keep you from living authentically. Take care of yourself. Do you have a need to be acknowledged, to be right, to be in control, to be loved? There are so many people who lived their lives without realizing their dreams and most of them end up being stressed or even depressed for that matter. List your top four needs and get them met before it's too late!

4. Know your passions
You know who you are and what you truly enjoy in life. Obstacles like doubt and lack of enthusiasm will only hinder you, but will not derail your chance to become the person you ought to be. Express yourself and honor the people who has inspired you to become the very person you wanted to be.

5. Live from the inside out
Increase your awareness of your inner wisdom by regularly reflecting in silence. Commune with nature. Breathe deeply to quiet your distracted mind. For most of us city slickers it's hard to even find the peace and quiet we want even in our own home. In my case I often just sit in a dimly lit room and play some classical music. There's sound, yes, but music does soothe the savage beast.

6. Honor your strengths
What are your positive traits? What special talents do you have? List three - if you get stuck, ask those closest to you to help identify these. Are you imaginative, witty, good with your hands? Find ways to express your authentic self through your strengths. You can increase your self-confidence when you can share what you know to others.

7. Serve others
When you live authentically, you may find that you develop an interconnected sense of being. When you are true to who you are, living your purpose and giving of your talents to the world around you, you give back in service what you came to share with others -your spirit - your essence. The rewards for sharing your gift with those close to you is indeed rewarding, much more if it were to be the eyes of a stranger who can appreciate what you have done to them.

Self-improvement is indeed one type of work that is worth it. It shouldn't always be within the confines of an office building, or maybe in the four corners of your own room. The difference lies within ourselves and how much we want to change for the better.

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT TO IMPROVE YOUR SELF?

Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities wrap ourselves up, we always come up with the idea of “I wish I was somebody else.”  More often than not, we think and believe that someone or rather, most people are better than us.- when in reality, the fact is, most people are more scared than us.

You spot a totally eye-catching girl sitting by herself at a party, casually sipping on a glass of Asti Spumanti. You think to yourself, “she looks so perfectly calm and confident.” But if you could read thru her transparent mind, you would see a bunch of clouds of thoughts and you might just be amazed that she’s thinking “are people talking about why I am seated here alone?... Why don’t guys find me attractive? …I don’t like my ankles, they look too skinny… I wish I was as intelligent as my best friend.”

We look at a young business entrepreneur and say “Wooh… what else could he ask for?” He stares at himself at the mirror and murmur to himself, “I hate my big eyes… I wonder why my friends won’t talk to me… I hope mom and dad would still work things out.”

Isn’t it funny? We look at other people, envy them for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they look at us and thinks of the same thing. We are insecure of other people who themselves are insecure of us. We suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope in self improvement because we are enveloped in quiet desperation.

Sometimes, you notice that you have an irritating habit like biting off your finger nails, having a foul mouth, and you – of all people, is the last to know.

I have a friend who never gets tired of talking. And in most conversations, she is the only one who seems to be interested in the things she has to say. So all of our other friends tend to avoid the circles whenever she’s  around, and she doesn’t notices how badly she became socially handicapped – gradually affecting the people in her environment.

One key to self improvement is to LISTEN and TALK to a trusted friend. Find someone who you find comfort in opening up with even the most gentle topics you want to discuss. Ask questions like “do you think I am ill-mannered?”,  “Do I always sound so argumentative?”,  “Do I talk too loud?”,  “Does my breath smell?”,  “Do I ever bore you when were together?”.  In this way, the other person will obviously know that you are interested in the process of self improvement. Lend her your ears for comments and criticisms and don’t give her answers like “Don’t exaggerate! That’s just the way I am!”  Open up your mind and heart as well. And in return, you may want to help your friend with constructive criticism that will also help her improve her self.

One of Whitney Houston’s songs says “Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.” True enough. In order to love others, you must love yourself too. Remember, you cannot give what you do not have.

Before telling other people some ways on how to improve themselves, let them see that you yourself is a representation and a product of self improvement. Self improvement makes us better people, we then inspire other people, and then the rest of the world will follow.

Stop thinking of yourselves as second-rate beings. Forget the repetitive thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on.  Accepting your true self is the first step to self improvement. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others only to find out at the end that we’ve got  10 more reasons to envy them.

We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We always wish we had better things, better features, better body parts, etc. But life need not to be perfect for people to be happy about themselves.Self improvement and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect and you are the best. It’s the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and happy.

Life is About Choices and the Decisions We Make

Life is like a road. There are long and short roads; smooth and rocky roads; crooked and straight paths. In our life many roads would come our way as we journey through life. There are roads that lead to a life of single blessedness, marriage, and religious vocation. There are also roads that lead to fame and fortune on one hand, or isolation and poverty on the other. There are roads to happiness as there are roads to sadness, roads towards victory and jubilation, and roads leading to defeat and disappointment.

Just like any road, there are corners, detours, and crossroads in life. Perhaps the most perplexing road that you would encounter is a crossroad. With four roads to choose from and with limited knowledge on where they would go, which road will you take? What is the guarantee that we would choose the right one along the way? Would you take any road, or just stay where you are: in front of a crossroad?


There are no guarantees.

You do not really know where a road will lead you until you take it. There are no guarantees. This is one of the most important things you need to realize about life. Nobody said that choosing to do the right thing all the time would always lead you to happiness. Loving someone with all your heart does not guarantee that it would be returned. Gaining fame and fortune does not guarantee happiness. Accepting a good word from an influential superior to cut your trip short up the career ladder is not always bad, especially if you are highly qualified and competent.  There are too many possible outcomes, which your really cannot control. The only thing you have power over is the decisions that you will make, and how you would act and react to different situations.


Wrong decisions are always at hindsight.

Had you known that you were making a wrong decision, would you have gone along with it? Perhaps not, why would you choose a certain path when you know it would get you lost? Why make a certain decision if you knew from the very beginning that it is not the right one. It is only after you have made a decision and reflected on it that you realize its soundness. If the consequences or outcomes are good for you, then you have decided correctly. Otherwise, your decision was wrong.


Take the risk: decide.

Since life offers no guarantee and you would never know that your decision would be wrong until you have made it, then you might as well take the risk and decide. It is definitely better than keeping yourself in limbo. Although it is true that one wrong turn could get you lost, it could also be that such a turn could be an opportunity for an adventure, moreover open more roads. It is all a matter of perspective. You have the choice between being a lost traveller or an accidental tourist of life.  But take caution that you do not make decisions haphazardly. Taking risks is not about being careless and stupid. Here are some pointers that could help you choose the best option in the face of life’s crossroads:
·    Get as many information as you can about your situation.

You cannot find the confidence to decide when you know so little about what you are faced with. Just like any news reporter, ask the 5 W’s: what, who, when, where, and why. What is the situation? Who are the people involved? When did this happen? Where is this leading? Why are you in this situation? These are just some of the possible questions to ask to know more about your situation. This is important. Oftentimes, the reason for indecision is the lack of information about a situation.

·    Identify and create options.

What options do the situation give you? Sometimes the options are few, but sometimes they are numerous. But what do you do when you think that the situation offers no options? This is the time that you create your own. Make your creative mind work. From the most simplistic to the most complicated, entertain all ideas. Do not shoot anything down when an idea comes to your head. Sometimes the most outrageous idea could prove to be the right one in the end. You can ask a friend to help you identify options and even make more options if you encounter some difficulty, but make sure that you make the decision yourself in the end.

·    Weigh the pros and cons of every option.

Assess each option by looking at the advantages and disadvantages it offers you. In this way, you get more insights about the consequences of such an option.

·    Trust yourself and make that decision.

Now that you have assessed your options, it is now time to trust yourself. Remember that there are no guarantees and wrong decisions are always at hindsight.  So choose… decide… believe that you are choosing the best option at this point in time.


Now that you have made a decision, be ready to face its consequences: good and bad. It may take you to a place of promise or to a land of problems. But the important thing is that you have chosen to live your life instead of remaining a bystander or a passive audience to your own life. Whether it is the right decision or not, only time can tell. But do not regret it whatever the outcome. Instead, learn from it and remember that you always have the chance to make better decisions in the future.

3 Qualities Of An Excellent Character

There are 3 qualities of an excellent character in a person. So if you want to be excellent, adopt these qualities and you are one.

1. Having A Great Sense of Responsibility
The foundation of character is the acceptance of responsibility. Let’s say you are a the head in the marketing department and your boss has given you a task to conduct a marketing campaign for the latest jewelry items of your company.

So obviously you need to assign different tasks to different sub-ordinates in your department. Some are doing the write-ups, some are editing the graphics and design, some are doing the banner, some are doing the printing or some are even promoting the new jewelry items.

Let’s say your designer is dragging his part and as a result, it becomes impossible to meet the deadline, what would you do? Is it your fault or your sub-ordinate’s fault?

You see, when you boss acknowledge the problem, he would not go to your sub-ordinate but to you alone. It is truly the manager’s (your) reponsibility to ensure everything go well on track.

So if you tell your boss it is not your fault but your sub-ordinate’s fault, he would not be able to accept it. Imagine if you were the boss, you wouldn’t accept any excuse like that too.

What if you tell your boss, ‘Sorry boss, I know my guy is dragging the whole project but I will make sure things will get back on track”. Imagine if you were the boss, you will be very happy listening to what your appointed manager has to say.

2. Integrity
I once attended an options trading preview seminar and the speaker told us what made him join Adam Khoo and Stuart Tan’s Adam Khoo Learning Technology Group (AKLTG) was the integrity he sees in them. He’s Conrad Lim and he co-authored the book ‘Secrets of Millionaire Investors‘.

Often I thought about it, while some thought millionaires are just lucky becoming who they are, I truly believe it is through their hard work and most importantly, their integrity.

Integrity is simply doing the right thing, even when nobody is looking at us. They do not do good because it looks good in the eyes of others but they do it because their integrity.

I once heard a pastor said, integrity comes from the word integrate, which means 2 become 1. It means whatever the mouth says, the action also does what exactly the mouth says.

3. Perseverance
Perseverance means persisting in or remain constant to be purpose, idea or task in spite of obstacles. I’ve even heard a man of excellence, Robb Thompson said this, “Success is the ability to endure hardship”.

Everybody goes through hardship and successful pass this test of endurance with perseverance. It is usually not easy to keep on keeping on and it is this little secret of ‘one more time’ or ‘a little bit more’ that makes their destiny reaches them.

I could have spent time getting you the ‘never give up’ quotes to motivate you but sometimes I just think you do not need them. You just need to keep going.

Failure is not a failure, unless you choose to give such meaning to it. Failure is simply a feedback of what does not work and what does.

These are the 3 qualities of an excellent character.

By: Clement Chee